April 1st, no fucking joke

If you, and "you" being everyone in the world minus 4 people that came for Hirudin and 20 southern folk, most of whom were in either the first or the last band that played, which I will get into a bit later, missed the show last night, consider yourselves lucky. You are officially having a good week. Let's begin the review of last night with a few highlights, shall we? These are in no particular order.
1. A surly boozehound businessy type man who I had dubbed Sherman, thought the last band rocked so hard hard he spent a majority of their set kicking over bar stools and turning every table in the joint upside down. He even got creative and began stacking upside down tables on top of barstools. One bar stool was hurled dangerously close to my drumkit. If it had connected, Sherman would certainly be hurtin' right now.
2. The first bands guitar player, whom I just plainly thought was a girl for the first hour in the bar. Fancy shades, orange suede jacket, hippie type hat that looks like a mushroom with a bill, long shiny purple scarf, and a long cigarette holder. Nice guy, but was wildly reminiscent of Janice from Dr. Teeth and the Electric Mayhem, the Muppet Band.
3. Free drink tickets. Mine were traded in for Bass and Guinness. D-lish.
4. When announced midset that we had buttons and cds, watching as the whole bar convened upon our merch table. That was cool to see. By this time there was a whopping 15 people in the place.
5. The new song, The Cancer Club, fucking rocked the joint last night. Ears bled.
Um, now for the lowlights.
1. Completely driving a song into the ground. Said song is now gone and buried. Never to be played again. It's a goner and we are not sad. The same might be said about Ill Mannered Allies, but I think once Michael hears it recorded he may actually like it.
2. We ended up charging a $3 cover when the show was promoted as being free. Apparently the Lyon's Den does not fully understand the workings of how to put on a show. Upon booking, instructions were given to the bands giving each individual band the choice on whether to charge a cover or not. We decided on not. Upon arrival, the other bands came to us saying the Lyon's Den wanted all the bands to be unanimous in the charging or not and the other bands needed gas money, being from hillbilly country and all. So we reluctantly agreed on $3. Yet another reason we were glad no one showed.
3. Sherman.
4. Listening to the last band end literally every between song banter with either the word "Shit" or "Biiiaatch".
5. Being the respectfull band we are, we wanted to wait for the last band to finish their set before loading out. Little did we know that their set was going to be over an hour and fifteen minutes, with only 6 people left in the place, of non-stop wanking, improv, 15 minute song-extending drum solos, random screeching guitar noises and never-ending auditory turmoil. It was getting ridiculous. They knew it. We knew it. That was pretty much everyone.
6. Sherman.
7. Standing in the Men's room for a solid 5 minutes, literally, just to get away from them. Standing. Maybe that sounds mean, but you weren't there.

A pact has been made to forget last night ever happened. And the Lyon's Den will remain Hirudin-free from here on out. It's a shame that the sound is really good there. Oh well. It's said and done. Next Thursday at the Fireside will be fun though. We're all excited.